Inspired once more.
May 12, 2009
There was only silence and the television until now. I never realized how both of those things were bad for me. Television sucked out my brain and creativity, and silence drove me crazy because all i would do was think about how fucked up and unhappy life was.
I was clueless when this was going on of course. That’s all i wanted to do. Just lie there motionless in bed and stare brainlessly at the TV. Oh, it did suck my creativity and motivation out the window. It almost disgusts me to think how bad i was — so uninspired and lacking. I liked it then, i did — I liked being blank and numb and depressed because when i stared at the TV i didn’t have to think about what i was running away from. There was only the characters i was watching and my brain that thought of nothing else and a body that did not want to move.
I never realized how much music changes my life — How much a good song can make me write paragraphs of silly thoughts or short stories or even make me want to draw. How a song can make my heart ache with love or longing and make me want to escape to somewhere where i dont have to be responsible, and somewhere where i am not me.
Music makes me feel good again.
